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| My last working day : ) |
Oops ... I have been slacking.... lazy...
Its been a while last I updated my blog.
My sincere apologies to those whom
had follow my path to wellness.
Over the span of 1 1/2yrs, I have met many people along the way. Cancer patients, caregivers, friends whom have someone diagnosed with cancer... all have the same question.
"What is the next thing to do when someone is diagnosed with cancer? "
I might have wrote this in my earlier blog but I will just write it again.
Dealing with a person having cancer is a challenging feat.
It takes a lot of courage, loads of patience & strong self determination to be a pillar of support.
There are some whom were diagnosed early & some diagnosed on the late stage.
Whatever the stages, believe in what we are able to help & never give up hope.
Everyone believes there is a higher "being" up there. Whatever that we are going through must had been pre-arranged as a challenge.
Its like a test to see how we are able to overcome it.
Our emotions are always the first to take the impact.
Feelings like sorrow, sadness, fear, frustration, anger, aimless are some of the common rejections that the person & the family will face.
The sense of a fatal possibility is extreme & that's why many will break down. Some will fall all the way if there isn't anyone to help them up.
My experience with cancer had put me in a position whereby I can advise based on what was good for me & what I think could had been better if I had did it in another way.
I do hope that it will help them someway, to get better & overcome our fight against our common enemy.
1. Supporting role of a CAREGIVER
To me, the person or family whom are taking care of the person diagnosed with cancer plays the biggest role as they have immediate contact with the person.
Their fighting spirit, positive mentality, the supporting words, the vast knowledge to advise, the protective role, the clear mind to weight what is best for the person, the never ending patience and the love for the person are some of the needed qualities to face the challenge together.
As a caregiver, he or she needs to become strong, become the strength when another is weak, to be the one whom held them up when they fall, & to give them faith because we believe they will heal.
2. Get a 2nd doctor's opinion to clear your doubt.
As you are the person paying the bill, you will only believe WHAT CERTIFIED DOCTORS say.
If you are unsure, go seek another doctor's advice.
It will settle your doubts and prepare you to face what is coming.
If you are sure on what you are facing & do not need another advise, then go ahead with the healing process with 100% faith in the doctors. Faith will carry a person a LONG way.
3. Have a CLEAR mind & choose what you need to listen.
Believe me, when a person is diagnosed with cancer, many people around he or she will give tons of advise. These people care & love, that is why they wanted the best for them. However, sometimes the advise might not be exactly convincing.
It could be " I heard that..." , " I found from the internet...." , " I know someone had the same thing & got healed..."... at the end of the day, a person can't be going around to try all healing methods, right?
If he or she does, they will purge like a water tap & the body will get very weak.
At the end of the day, the body might fail to fight the cancerous cells because it is not strong enough to strengthen the antibodies to fight.
Therefore, make up your mind to stick to the method which you think is best.
Once you have chosen, believe that it will work.
Faith can do miracles to the healing process.
4. Western + Eastern Cure
If you have done some research, you will find that eastern medication has good effects on fighting cancer as well.
Ayurvedic practice, yoga, meditation, acupuncture & herbs has its own effective ways of healing.
As for myself, I had chosen chinese herbs & twice weekly acupuncture to help my body to keep the cancer cells at bay.
Western medication kills the cancerous cells, as well as the healthy cells & its only short term.
However, we can't be sure whether the cancerous cells are fully killed or not.
On a long term, do remember that our body's antibody is the best agent to kill the cancerous cells.
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| My Driving Factor |
5. Own Will Power
What pushes he or she to get better? You must find the answer for them.
Someone that they love? The feeling of not letting anyone down?
Hasn't travel to the other side of the world yet? Or climb the highest mountain? Dive into the deep blue sea?
You must find a strong motivation factor to drive them & weather the hardship during healing.
As for myself, my son was the biggest driving factor.
I know that he is still small & needs a father to love him.
Thoughts of love is one of the strong motivational factor.
6. Know Your Medicine.
After seeing the doctor, a person will feel lost, confuse & disorganize.
Whatever it is, he or she needs to start the process of healing... operation, chemotherapy or radiotherapy.
They must heal for the sake of the people around them, not for the sake of themselves.
They need to be brave & face the challenge.
To strengthen their confidence, know what they will be putting into their mouth or injecting into their body.
Its always good to check & know information like the medicine's origin, the side effects & the do's & don'ts during medication.
Many do not take the impact of the side effects well.
Common side effects like loosing the hair gives BIG impact to some people, especially for ladies.
It takes great courage for a woman to walk out of her house with a bald head.
That's why during some of the cancer awareness events, some woman will volunteer & shave their head bald in support of the event.
Know the medicine so that they are able to anticipate whats coming.
7. GET OUT from the house.
A person with cancer is not contagious.
They do not need to confine ourselves in the house facing the 4 sides of the walls.
Having cancer is not the end of the world. Rather it's a NEW BEGINNING to a chapter of their life.
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| A trip to Bangkok with my friends |
They need to go out & get some air. They need to mingle with other beings.
There's always a positive advantage when they seek solace in others.
Be proud of who they are & what had happened.
Hiding isn't going to help the situation to get better.
It's good to continue & lead a normal life, with lesser stress of course.
8. Go for a walk. Exercise
Hey, even if their body is weak, doesn't mean that they can just sit there & be a couch potato.
GET THEIR BUM up & start to move the body.
Exercising helps in many ways. It keeps the occupied. It helps the frail body to sweat.
It keeps the body moving & make it hungry.
Do brisk walking. Or swimming. Or do some house work like sweeping or moping.
9. Watch what you are eating.
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| Fresh salad but not too much |
This is one part which is rather difficult. It always play tricks in their mind.
Rule of thumb, watch what they eat.
Western doctors will advise them to eat whatever that they could.
Eastern doctors will only limit the choice to certain foods.
Choose wisely & practice it. Get a certified doctor for advise.
Especially when the side effect kicks in, the appetite will change like the wind.
Eat the food that they could eat but don't engorge too much of it, especially food which they are not suppose to touch. |
| Taken at Kek Lok Si, Penang |
10. Religion
If they have a religion, its always good to pray for body & mental strength.
If they have a religion, its always good to pray for body & mental strength.
If they don't, they could consider believing in a higher being than ourselves.
I have read a couple of books where cancer survivors used religion to heal themselves.
Its pretty amazing & heart warming to hear that miracles can happen anywhere.
BUT, DO NOT PRESS OR FORCE THEM. IF THEY DO NOT WANT TO HEAR, THEN STOP PREACHING.
It will only irritate them & they might shut themselves out from you.
You don't know how dreadful it feels when we go through the side effects of the chemo or radio or even post operation.
11. Patience
The healing process will take time. It depends on the number of chemo/radio cycles & the body condition.
Things will not happen overnight. Confide in them & give an ear to them.
They need you to listen to them & not the other way round.
Be patient with them & patiently walk them through the process.
From my experience, the above should do. If you need any advise, just drop me a mail.
I will advise the best that I could, based on my experience & capacity.
I will advise the best that I could, based on my experience & capacity.
Just to update what I'm up to now...
My last chemo was done on 10 May 2011.
It has been more than a year. Its really hard to believe what I had experienced.
Contrary to what I felt when I was diagnosed with cancer; I take the experience as a blessing & a life enrichment programme.
Life has never been that meaningful until I fell, bruised & started to look around myself.
Who are the important people in my life?
What have I achieved till now?
Have I climbed a mountain to be closer to the angels above?
Have I dive into the sea to the take a look?
Have I spend quality time with my family?
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| Mt. Kinabalu |
We, mankind do not realize how short our life is until we start to loose some important people or things in our life.
We will never stop to chase after the riches that we had created for ourselves.
Instead, we can forget & forgo the body health which GOD has created for us.
As ironic as it sounds, you know this is true.
Every cancer survivor has a common fear.... a relapse of the cancer experience.
Whenever there's a pain or unusual feeling that we feel in our body, it automatically pops out in our mind... "Is this another cancer sign?"
Yes, it happens to me every time as well.
Yet, after a while, I will forget & start to walk again.
I've come to understand that there is no point to live in fear.
Even if it did come, we still need to go through the process of recovery for the sake of our loved ones.
Agree?
So, rather than tormenting our brain cells, why not adopt the "Preventive Maintainance" of ourselves?
That "Preventive Call" came to me &...VOILA!
I quit my job & started to lead a QUALITY life.
It's been more than a month now since I started to work on my own.
I traded my semiconductor sales job for a simple small business owner, doing instant photo, printing & business services kiosk.
Honestly, the responsibility is way much different compared to corporate life.
If we take a day off from the office, we still get our salary.
BUT being a business owner, if we don't work, we get nothing = '0' ~!
The pressure is different.
Being an employee, we are pressured to deliver the results to the company.
BUT being self-employed, the pressure is to deliver a hot meal to my family with a proper roof above their heads.
At the end of the day, the quality of a person's life depends on how well he/she deals with the uncertainty. (I learn this from my buddy, Ryan Long. It was quoted by Anthony Robbins).
Secondly, Aerosmith sang this theme song from the movie, Armageddon.
It's called "Don't Wanna Miss a Thing".
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| 3 of us at Cameron Highlands, again. |
My feelings are just like the song. I don't wanna miss a thing that is important to me.
I don't want to miss the quality family time which I can have with my wife & son.
Not forgetting the quality time which I can have with my parents, siblings, relatives, buddies & friends.
All are very important to me, especially those whom had supported & helped me up during my 6 mths of recovery.
I'm planning on a few holidays with my family too. It doesn't need to be fanciful like going overseas or spending a hefty sum of money to have fun.
Instead, its the time which we will spend together.
To be able to sit down, talk casually, take artistic pictures, dine, swim & enjoying the moments together is so wonderful. These are quality time.
It's something which money can't buy as we can't turn back the clock.
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| Kellie's Castle |
On our first trip, we went to Penang with Ryusei's godparents. It was a real good "eat your heart out" 2days trip. On our way down, we routed to Batu Gajah to see Kellie's Castle.
Ryusei wanted to see it as he had always read it in his school books. The castle was well kept & quite number of local tourist as well. Hope that it remains that way it is, full of mysteries at every corner.
Right after spending a couple of hours there, we continued our journey up to Cameron Highlands.
It took us like 3 hours just to reach the rest house. The traffic was bad due to the school holidays.
Again, the time that we spent there was just wonderful. It was so relaxing just sitting there reading books, surfing with the Ipad, taking short naps.... all of these makes me wonder why I didn't stop to look around me until I had cancer.
Does it really take pain & suffering to wake a person up? I guess it does.
I'm very happy now & able to sleep tight.
I'm enjoying everyday.. its such a wonderful feeling.
My next trip is coming very soon... Mt. Kinabalu Expedition.
Till then, I will write again.
Ta~ Ta ~! 
